I’ve taken the day to visit a Xhosa village. There are many different African cultures. The Xhosa speak with several different clicking sounds added to some of the words. Mama Tofu is our guide. She’s a 93 year old widow raised the Xhosa way. She is lively full of whit and glows with excitement to show us her home and spend an hour or more explaining the Xhosa customs.
The traditional Xhosa home is comprised of a few round huts, however in modern times most home sites are comprised of a couple traditional round huts and also a simple one or two room concrete block structure.
In their culture the women show their availability by their clothing. Young women that are single and still virgins wear short skirts, not quite mini, but close. Teenage boys when they are coming of age go through an extensive ritual culminating in circumcision as an introduction to manhood. When a man finds a prospective mate he must court and ask her for her love. She has the right to turn him down. If she accepts the boy must pay her family with 18 cows. Many men now days forgo marriage as the price is steep. A single cow cost 6,000 Rand and the average person is only making 70-100 Rand per day. Once women are married their clothing changes to a longer dress.
Once married it is the women’s responsibility to adopt her husbands believes and culture. She is to do what she is told by her man. Women are expected to cook, clean, take care of all the farm chores, support their man, and get pregnant soon after marriage. A typical Xhosa wife will have 10 or more children. If the majority of her kids are girls, it is likely the family will become wealthy from all the cows they receive for their girls hands. Brings a new idea to retirement planning. If the women is not pregnant shortly after marriage it is assumed something is wrong with her and she is put through a very long ritual to assist her spirt in conceiving.
While the men have had to work hard to afford 18 cows for a girls devotion, once he’s married his responsibilities diminish. While his wife does all the work he’s expected to smoke and drink with the other men of the village. Hmm doesn’t sound all that bad, if I didn’t have to live in a hut…. 🙂 Nah, I don’t want all the kids.
If a woman cheats on her husband he is allowed to divorce her while the women is shamed and he takes his 18 cows back from her parents. If a man cheats, nothing is said or done about it. Seems like a life many chauvinistic men would be attracted to.
